The inner critic is that voice inside that started with the criticisms of childhood (verbal and non-verbal) or negative work environments or abusive relationships.
Babbling non-stop during stressful situations, the voice we hear has this message “You’re not enough” or “You’re stupid” or “You’re ugly.” And in more recent years, you may have added “I’m just a drunk” or other scathing personal judgements.
Even if we read personal growth books, go to seminars and tell ourselves that we’re not those defeatist messages, the inner critic does not shut up until we have explored our beliefs and attachments to these voices.
Attachments? Yes, we get used to repeat mental and emotional constructs that show up as repetitive inner dialogue and habits.
At The Exclusive, we use a number of brilliant techniques to get to the source of this self-inflicted pain, and root it out.
First, one must consciously hear the inner dialogue and claim it without denial. Our counselors specialize in assisting clients to embrace the reality of what they are creating.
Even self-criticism has a purpose. Usually we are trying to make ourselves better by focusing on fixing our brokenness.
Unfortunately it doesn’t work well. Einstein said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results.” Our job is to help disassemble destructive cycles.
Personal in-the-moment awareness is necessary, as is non-judgmental curiosity about why we do what we do.
At The Exclusive, we are strength-based in our approach, which means that we do not focus on brokeness, rather we focus on wholeness that is innate and accessible in all people.
Do we think you are bad for having a head for of negative messages? No. We think you are doing what you learned long ago and now you’re able to learn something far more empowering.